Merry Christmas

nae

Zingerbug on imikimi - Customize Your World

Before I was a MOM

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How totally true.......

Before I was a Mom
Before I was a mom I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.

I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.

I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a MomI had never been puked on. Pooped on. Chewed on. Peed on.

I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.

I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests. Or giveshots.

I never looked into teary eyes and cried.I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.

I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a MomI never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put themdown.

I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stopthe hurt.

I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.

I never knew that I could love someone so much.I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom.

I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.

I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.

I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so importantand happy.
Before I was a Mom I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes tomake sure all was okay.

I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom.

lmfao

The Zipper

As the bus stopped andit was her turn to get on, she became
aware that her skirt was too tight toallow her leg to
come up to the height of the first step of thebus. Slightlyembarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus
driver, she reached behind her to unzip herskirt a little,
thinking that this would give her enough slackto raise her leg
She tried to take the step, only to discoverthat she couldn't. So, alittle more embarrassed, she once again reached
behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, andfor the
second time attempted the step. Onceagain, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg
With a little smile to the driver, she againreached behind
to unzip a little more and again was unable totake the step. About this time, a large Texan who was standing
behind her picked her up easily by thewaist
and placed her gently on the step of thebus. She went ballistic and turned to the
would-be Samaritan
and yelled,
'How dare you touch my body!
I don't even know who you are!' TheTexan smiled and drawled,
'Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you,
but after you unzipped my fly three times,
I kinda figured we was friends.'

wow

Only great minds can read this
This is weird, but interesting!

fi yuo cna raed this, yuo have a sgtrane mnid too

Cna yuo raed this? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseae t! he huam n m nid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

puppy size

I Wish You Puppy Size

This is one of the neatest stories I've ever heard.You will know precisely what this little girl is talking about at the end (you'llwant to share this one with your loved ones and special friends)!'Danielle keeps repeating it over and over again.We've been back to this animal shelter at least five times.
It has been weeks now since westarted all of this,' the mother told the volunteer. 'What is it she keeps asking for?' the volunteer asked. Puppy size!' replied the mother. Well, we have plenty of puppies, if that's what she's lookingfor. I know...we have seen most of them,' the mom said in frustration...Just then Danielle came walking into the officeWell, did you find one?' asked her mom. 'No, not thistime,' Danielle said with sadness in her voice.'Can we come back on the weekend?'The two women looked at each other, shook their headsand laughed.'You never know when we will get more dogs.Unfortunately, there's always a supply,' the volunteer said.Danielle took her mother by the hand and headed to the door.'Don't worry, I'll find one this weekend,' she said.Over the next few days both mom and dad had long conversationswith her. They both felt she was being too particular. 'It's thisweekend or we're not looking any more,' Dad finally said in frustration.We don't want to hear anything more about puppy size either,'Mom added.Sure enough, they were the first ones in the shelter on Saturdaymorning. By now Danielle knew her way around, so she ran right forthe section that housed the smaller dogs.Tired of the routine, mom sat in the small waiting room at the endof the first row of cages. There was an observation window so youcould see the animals during times when visitors weren't permitted.Danielle walked slowly from cage to cage, kneeling periodically totake a closer look. One by one the dogs were brought out and sheheld each one. One by one she said, 'Sorry, you're not the one.'It was the last cage on this last day in search of the perfect pup.The volunteer opened the cage door and the child carefully pickedup the dog and held it closely. This time she took a little longer.'Mom, that's it! I found the right puppy! He's the one! I knowit!' she screamed with joy. 'It's the puppy size!'
'But it's the same size as all the other puppies you held over thelast few weeks,' Mom said. 'No, not size ---- the sighs.When I held him in my arms, he sighed,' she said.'Don't you remember? When I asked you one day what love is, youtold me love depends on the sighs of your heart. The more you love, thebigger the sigh!'The two women looked at each other for a moment. Mom didn't know whether to laugh or cry. As she stooped down to hug the child, shedid a little of both.'Mom, every time you hold me, I sigh. When you and Daddy come homefrom work and hug each other, you both sigh. I knew I would findthe right puppy if it sighed when I held it in my arms,' she said.Then holding the puppy up close to her face she said, 'Mom, he lovesme. I heard the sighs of his heart!'Close your eyes for a moment and think about the love that makesyou sigh. I not only find it in the arms of my loved ones, but in thecaress of a sunset, the kiss of the moonlight and the gentle brush of coolair on a hot day.They are the sighs of God. Take the time to stop and listen; youwill be surprised at what you hear.Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

funny

> >>> An old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up> >>> from the couch then starts putting on his coat.His> >>> wife, seeing the unexpected behavior, asks,> >>>> >>> "Where are you going?"> >>>> >>> He replies, "I'm going to the doctor."> >>> She says, "Why, are you sick?"> >>>> >>> He says, "Nope, I'm going to get me some of> >>> that> >>> Viagra stuff."> >>>> >>> Immediately the wife starts working and positioning> >>> herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put> >>> on her coat.> >>>> >>> He says, "Where the heck are you going"?> >>>> >>> She answers, "I'm going to the doctor,> >>> too."> >>> He says, "Why, what do you need?"> >>>> >>> She says, "If you're going to start using that> >>> rusty old thing, I'm> >>> getting a Tetanus shot."

lol

A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.

out of the mouths of babes

too funny

Baptist Cowboy

Baptist Cowboy

A cowboy, who is visiting Wyoming from Texas , walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud. He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time." The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Arizona , the other is in Colorado . When we all left our home in Texas , we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there. The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn. One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs. All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss." The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs. "Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains, "It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking." "Hasn't affected my brothers though."

out of the mouth of babes

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the TenCommandments with her five and six year olds.After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Fatherand thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment thatteaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of afamily) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

Life is short...

Life is short,

Break the rules,

Forgive quickly,

Kiss slowly,

Love truly,

Laugh uncontrollably,

And never regret anything that made you smile.

The long hair...

Sk8ter Boy Look....

Christian's 12th birthday

Dont they all look so much alike?

humor

Dad I miss you terribly...

My Dill

oh so rotten

childhood pal

My crazy sense of humor

Grandmas Don't Know Everything

Little Tony was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He'd been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the houseand asked her, 'Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep in thesame room and one is on top of the other?'She was a little taken back, but she decided to just tell him the truth.'It's called sexual intercourse, darling.'

Tony just said, 'Oh, OK,' and went back outside to play with the other kids. A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, 'Grandma, it isn't called sexual intercourse. It's called Bunk Beds. And Jimmy's Mom wants to talk to you.'

2008

SCHOOL PICS 2008

Steph and Josh's pic of my dad.

"Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."